Our admin person has posted these on our office’s daily status update. They made me laugh, so I thought I’d share.
Rules of This Household
1. If you are not here for dinner, too bad. This is not a fast-food place where the cook is on duty at all times. The cook works full time and does not need a second job.
2. If you make a mess, clean it up. The dishwasher is open 24 hours a day to service you as are the vacuum, broom, and sponge. Please help them to help you by using them. If you need assistance, ask the cook – she will be happy to give you training on any of the equipment.
3. The taxi service for this household is not on call 24 hours. You must make reservations at least 12 hours in advance. You have two good legs, skateboards, and bikes that are somewhat operational; one of you has a vehicle that works. Use them. By the way, skateboards are to be used on the outside of this house and are never to be used in the living room just because the landing is softer when you fall.
4. We are not a bank and you have no collateral to offer us. Face it: We own everything you have and I have receipts to prove it, so don’t ask us for loans. Get jobs! We have them. Try it and you might like it (not so much the work as the money).
5. Curfew is negotiable, but try not to be late too often because it could go either way.
6. Tell us where you are going. GOOD GRIEF! I am way older than you, and I still tell my mother where I am going when I am at her house. Leave us a note or try to form words describing where you are going while we are in the room with you. Honestly, we don’t bite unless provoked.