“Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practised within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.”
Here’s the key to the numbers:
1. Recycling bins outside stable.
2. A sheep plugging veganism – and muzzled in case it bites – plus another sheep advertising British Meat in fairness to non-vegetables
3. Banner proclaims: “Atheism is OK too”.
4. Fathers 4 justice protestor in Batman outfit.
5. Solar panels on stable roof.
6. Wise man in a wheelchair.
7. “Safety in the stable” poster.
8. Fire extinguisher next to poster.
9. Angel in high-visibility jacket.
10. Wheelchair ramp to stable.
11. Statues from other religions surround the manger.
12. Joseph wears hard hat – as does Mary.
13. Mothers for justice demonstrator in Wonder Woman outfit.
14. Hand washing facility.
15. Essential first aid kit.
16. Figure in T-shirt with slogan: “Scientology rocks!”
17. Airport-style metal detector.